saint nick
Unregistered User
(12/31/01 3:00 pm) Reply
holiday
Now with the holidays amongst us, full throttle as you bend down to pick up your half drunk bottle of Heineken, only to get it to your lips and realize there's a cigarette butt touching your tongue. You look to your girlfriend, and then to your friends, and then to yourself because you are the only one who was smoking and all that cheer must have blinded you from defecating in your very own drink. That defecation that happens on black out nights, and New Years, and every other holiday you made up this year like "laundry day" and "I'm making a sandwich".
And I especially liked the last time you celebrated the "birth of a nation" and you made up a nation ... I think it was a "nation of shits", or "crap of nations" or something, and everyone played their part to follow out this giant ass. It was superb! And you brought a 1.5 liter bottle of Lambrusco over for that day, because some days need things like that. And you said "we would have been better off on ecstasy and dribbling on the sidewalk outside of the Den" and I agree. But age has come with the holidays and we've had to give up some of those things we once could have destroyed pieces of the frontal lobe with, so as to leave us able to speak to our girlfriends without mumbling things like "whirrrrrrrrr!!!" and "blaaaaaaah!!!", when in our mind we were saying "the band" and "wetzel". Now we can clearly annunciate these words and I'm sure we're at least slightly better people because of it.
Although some critics may not agree... to the holidays, fact and fiction. My friends all held in high spots. If anyone see's Wetzel working at Krogers (I know he's there, I've heard him paged over the intercom), hug him, then grab his balls. He needs a little of both.
Gimme that damn sandwich! I'll eat anything! Over the holidays I drank too much at a party. The demon alcohol made me piss in the punchbowl and then I kicked the assorted cheese tray into the stratosphere. You can imagine the look on the host's face. I'm a good person full of love, but my temper got the best of me after I was unceremoniously removed from the premises. I drove my El Camino through their damn trailer.
St Nick
Unregistered User
(12/24/03 10:02 pm) Reply
two years
Reminiscing and backtracking to the second post on this board two years ago, I thought I would send it to the forefront. Those were different times my friends. Different times that were slightly the same. Jason was probably in his 40 ounce stage and Billy was as well. They had not graduated to vodka quite yet. Tori smoked Corey was not considered "legally" insane. It was a sort of off the books, "that dude ain't right." Rob Wehrle didn't have all those "emergencies" (I call it bed wetting) he is always stressed out over now and I think he was heavier and looked more like st. nick. Dan was a man, a real by god man! Now just an empty shell he can be seen down at those high roller clubs all over town, or is that Billy? Anyway, I don't pay attention to peoples names or faces. I don't know Nick Crothers from Jason Henry. Or that Billy @#%$ from that creepy midget on "Passions". But if you didn't get it yet, what I'm getting at is it's christmas eve and I hope everyone sleeps tight.
I Like Monikers
Unregistered User
(12/26/03 7:55 pm) Reply
Hammy
Sniff..scratch some more....sniff...so on. I've grown out and up. Increased while attempting to decrease and vice a versa. Luckily, up is down to the brain and my heart yearns for the next run on sentence. I tee hee hee, toeing through schools of ego; at times my own. private schools are not necessarily "private." These people, this life, this love, these days of Billy, Jason, Daniel, Corey, Rob, and respectfully the energy between of addages, anecdotes, anchoring, arrowing, attacking, and posturing (allofwhich have never lost breath...nor step for that matter) have fulfilled so many wishes in my book. Blessed and Sound One for all. Happy New Year
Dr Nick Crothers PhD
Unregistered User
(1/2/04 11:12 am) Reply
That's my Mama!
Having recently accquired a Masters degree in Behavioral Psychology from the Univeristy of The Back of This Mexican Guy's Van, I have to say that my recent enlightenment and education has allowed me to look at the holidays with a refreshed and renewed sense of balance. The holidays have their way of bringing about what those of us in the Profession call, "Really Bummed Out Vibes Syndrome"
Dr. Nick Crothers' prescription for this affliction is as follows:
2 Hits of Really Good Ecstacy
1 liter Premium Vodkey (Grey Goose is preferred, but Pearl may be substituted)
2 liters Tonic Quinine Water
1 box of Mementos from an ex-girlfriend/boyfriend, preferably love letters, photographs, postcards.
1 box kleenex
1 Bed
1 set clean sheets, treated with "Springtime Fresh" Downy or Equivalent Fabric Softener
1 Blunt Instrument
Directions for use
1. Take 2 hits of ecstacy. 2. Combine 1 part Premium Vodkey with 2 parts Tonic Quinine Water. 3. Sip Vodkey/Tonic until ecstacy effects kick in and warm sense of self completeness kicks in. 4. Continue to drink Vodkey/Tonic intermittently during complete effects of Ecstacy (6-8 hours). 5. Open box of old mementos from ex girlfriend/boyfriend. 6. Read letters until tears of wistful joy appear in your eyes. 7. Wipe tears with Kleenex. 8. Make Bed with Clean Sheets. 9. Lay in bed. 10. Strike your head with blunt instrument, until unconsciousness is achieved.
If this regimen is followed to the letter, you will find that when/if you wake up from your sleep, you will be refreshed and renewed, ready to face this wonderful New Year with gusto, and possibly mustard.
If you wish, you may print this page out and give to your local kroger pharmacist or other local drug dealer of choice.
Corey was not considered "legally" insane. It was a sort of off the books, "that dude ain't right." Rob Wehrle didn't have all those "emergencies" (I call it bed wetting) he is always stressed out over now and I think he was heavier and looked more like st. nick. Dan was a man, a real by god man! Now just an empty shell he can be seen down at those high roller clubs all over town, or is that Billy? Anyway, I don't pay attention to peoples names or faces. I don't know Nick Crothers from Jason Henry. Or that Billy @#%$ from that creepy midget on "Passions". But if you didn't get it yet, what I'm getting at is it's christmas eve and I hope everyone sleeps tight.
Email This To a Friend
Topic Commands
Click to receive email notification of replies 
Click to stop receiving email notification of replies